Before you think you might have a mental illness, read this.
So you've noticed that you're not quite feeling yourself lately. Maybe you can't focus on anything, enjoy the things you once did, sleep or eat as well... perhaps you might be thinking that there's something wrong with you. There could very well be, but before you come to this conclusion, there's something everyone needs to look at.
I'm a no bullshit person. So, if you're offended by honesty and crippling language, I suggest that this is the last line for you to read.
First of all, look around you. Look on your Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, phone contacts, and all that jazz. How many pieces of shit do you have influencing your life? How many "friends" do you have that criticise everything you do? How many of these people do you hear from regularly? How many of these arseholes take the time to make you feel worse about yourself? I can guarantee you've got social vampires on every edge of your circle. So, here's some advice from me, someone who has lived her entire life criticised, bullied, and generally just made to feel guilty about being herself :)
- If they feel the need to fill you with negative shite every single time you speak, cut that bitch off.
- If you find yourself feeling abnormally tired and drained around them... bitch bye.
- If you find that you give so much to that person and they give you fuck all in return, including gratitude, book them a ticket to get the fuck out of your life.
- If they do you so wrong, and you know for a fact you did your best with them, wave goodbye to that shit.
One thing I've learned is that whether they are a family friend, a friend, partner, pet, astronaut, vegan, whatever—if they are toxic, get rid. Remove the poisonous, life sucking little shits out of your life first.
The people around us influence everything we do, and play a huge part in moulding who we are and who we will become. If you have people around you who like to hold onto your past mistakes, they have no intention of being positive in your future. Believe me. Surround yourself with people that know what you are, know your flaws and madness, and love you for it anyway.
Society is fake. Everyone is painting a picture about how perfect they are, how much money they make, how everything just seems to work out all of the fucking time and it is bullllllllllllshit. Life is hard, why do we need narcissistic arseholes making it look so fucking easy when they're probably as messed up as the rest of us?
Fuck external verification. Trust your gut; your instincts will never lie or manipulate you. Fuck what anyone else has to say. If you know in your heart and soul that you are right, or something you're doing is right for you, then you are fucking right. Anyone who wants to drag you down and make you doubt yourself, cut the ties. These vampires suck the positivity from you and act as an anchor. You will never grow with dead weight hanging off of you.
So, before you are convinced that there is something wrong with YOU, have a good look at the army you've recruited. Do they have your back, or are they against you in disguise? Don't doubt yourself, and certainly do not change who you are for anyone. They can like it or fucking lump it.
And last but certainly not least, my disclaimer. If you are outraged by this, you know where the door is. If you want to go and laugh about how I'm having a mental breakdown, you're probably right, but off you fucking pop. I have borderline (apparently), I'm outspoken, I'm outrageous, and I've been hated all of my life for speaking my mind. And finally, I do not give a flying fuck. I've spent years trying to please the world, and honestly, you'll always be changing. For those of you that are growing and aware of yourselves, embrace it. I fucking love that. Just keep being you because this world and the society we live in is vile, and genuine people have no place here. So go and fuck shit up with your congruence.
I told lies in the past. Some big, some small. I had attention issues and for a very good reason. But guess what? Because I did that in my younger years, I now do it ALL the time right? There's no possible wayyyyyy I could have gone to therapy, got the help I need and changed. I'll always be a manipulative, lying, mess of a person because I was once very unwell. And this stuff comes from my family alone, folks. Even when I have solid proof, nope, I've altered the evidence somehow. Ha, fuck people. Once you get the label guys, they will never let you become anything other than what you were at rock bottom.
Do your own shit because no matter what you do, some imperfect little shit will judge you anyways. I'm happy being imperfect.
Much love. A self aware nut-case. 🖤