Who Are You?

There is nothing like reaching your 30's and questioning the last 10 years of your life. Now you are like some obsessed accountant trying to find the receipts to verify your past relationships, your mistakes, your fights, your accomplishments, your failures, and where did all that freaking money go!!!! After pondering over this for days you realize there is no answer you were simply living life in your messy, disorderly fashion. But you woke up this morning and you looked in the mirror in your home and then it comes to you hey!!! I didn't do too bad I have a place to live. If you are reading this and you were one of those Dudley-do-right individuals that went straight from high school to college, traveled the world, met your significant over a candle lit dinner, and had your kids when you got married, then I want to congratulate you.

See I'm not the type of person that ever arrives on time to a function but bet your sweet ass I will arrive disheveled, with a crazy song blaring from my radio, and a story about last night that would make your grandmother blush. I think my 20's was like a training camp to be prepared to be sent out on the field for war in my 30's. There are times in my fleeting youth where I thought could make a plan and I would actually stick to this fictitious road map and then one crazy night in a bar a drunk guy told with his beer scented breathe "life is what happens while your'e making plans. Some people think you acquire wisdom through living life and growing older.... and I got mine from realizing he is a jerk and you keep dating idiots like him now tell him you are going to the bathroom and run to your car and leave.

I have a theory please don't quote me on this there are two types of people in the world there are the ones that own up to their errors and sometimes repeat them and grow from it, and there are the other type that hide their mistakes to protect their image. Well guess what last night I went on a date with that guy I mentioned before the one I ditched and when I went to the bar the drunk guy that same night told me life is what happens while your'e making plans. As people reluctantly inch closer and closer to our mid thirties we start to fret over the plans we didn't follow through with and dreams we left deferred but never congratulate ourselves for our triumphant victory because obviously you are alive and reading this. I have regrets you have regrets we all have regrets despite that we have made it to this era before our 40's and its not smoke and mirrors you made it.

Remember the lotus flower grows from the mud and the drunk guy at the bar last night was my Oracle and life you have an interesting way of telling me what I need to hear. Can you accept that although you're job pays well but you are miserable and its okay to do something else or maybe that awesome person you married after five years isn't so shiny, pretty, and full of wonder they have become someone you use to know. Plans are meant to be changed you are meant to change or else you become that person at the party everyone one hates because they made their mistakes and cant live up to your image of a life. Truth is I don't give advice I bestow cautionary tales to the masses so of your plans do go accordingly you cant come after me. So as I wash my face and listen to my 90's pop songs on youtube I'm still on this journey.....welcome to your 30's.