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Everyone wonders who they are at some point of time or another. Some get the answers they're searching for, while others keep searching for years and years until they finally either die or give up and move on. Who you are and who you're supposed to be are two completely different things. Maybe you're supposed to be the perfect child and follow in the footsteps of your parents or grandparents. That doesn't mean that's who you are. In order to find out who you are, you must journey that path alone. The people you meet along the way will help you discover the answers you so desperately seek, but that's all they can do.
I am still trying to find who I am. I feel as if I only know half of me; to me, that is both scary and intriguing. I am scared because I don't know half of myself. What if it is someone I don't like? However, it's for that same exact reason I find myself intrigued and motivated to keep searching. So what if I don't like the outcome of my other half? It's still me, and as long as I know that, I can rest easier knowing that I have the answers I've been searching for since I was in middle school. I'll finally know who I am, and I can use that knowledge to become who I am meant to be.
Let's say that you are the biggest football star on campus. Sure, you got a full ride on a football scholarship. Sure, you're only doing it because one of your family members made it to the NFL, and people expect the same of you. However, that's all it is: people's expectations. It's a lot of pressure to live up to something like that; you're worried about letting everyone down if you don't make it to the NFL. Think about your life, though; is this truly who you are? Do you really want to stay on this path, or would you rather be doing something else, something that makes you happy?
Let's say you want to go into an artistic profession, but your parents are pushing you to become a cop, or to join the Army or Navy. It's completely different than what you want to do with your life, but you don't want to disappoint your parents. It's okay to sit down with your parents and talk to them about what you would prefer to pursue in life. They may not agree with your decision, but they don't really have the right to stop you as long as it is something that you honestly are passionate about doing. That doesn't mean that you can't become an officer upholding the law, or can't serve your country by becoming a soldier. It doesn't make you a traitor to your country if you decide to not fight its wars. That's just a part of who you are as a person. Not everyone is born to serve as a soldier, a medic, or local law enforcement. If you force yourself into a position like that, even though it makes you unhappy, then you aren't being true to yourself or living an honest life. If you were to put yourself through that, you'd be living a lie; and as brutal or as exaggerated as that sounds, it's the cold, hard truth.
If you ever find yourself unhappy with who people believe you are, change it. Just stop whatever you're doing and take the time to discover who you really are first and foremost. Then, introduce your true self to everyone you know, and just choose whichever path leads you to pure happiness. It won't always be an easy journey, but it will always be worth the time and effort you put into finding yourself. There won't be any more doubts about who you are because you won't have to feel like you're pretending to be someone else anymore. If your name is Peter Raines, then find out how to be Peter Raines and who he is. Don't try to be a different Peter. Just be yourself and everything will be fine.
I hope this helps someone who is struggling with something like this. It isn't always an easy thing to admit, not even to ourselves. However, it is possible to find the answers you may need; when the time comes for you to take this journey, you should take it. It's perfectly okay to ask for help from friends and family, but the end result will still be discovered by only you. Take all the time that you need to discover who you really are, because you only have one life to live. Do all you can to be happy with whatever path you choose to follow; don't do anything that you may regret later on in life. Don't dwell on the past, or you'll never be able to fully move on with your life and make meaningful choices.