The Unspoken Side Effects of Your Twenties

Your twenties are full of changes. Scary, fun, exciting, and anxiety provoking changes. And often times our control over those changes are extremely limited. I mean the chances of winning the lottery, limited. In your twenties you will probably face employment scarcity, career opportunities, pregnancies, weddings, life disasters, huge life milestones, and amazing new adventures.

Essentially, life in your twenties is a roller coaster at Universal Studios that you can’t get off of until it no longer has fuel. And during your ride on the twenties coaster, your mind becomes stuck on the past, present, and future feelings, actions, thoughts, and lifestyle choices. Despite all the growth we thought we had accomplished in high school and college, nothing prepared us for this awkward unspoken changing period of our lives. Not even our endless research projects, essays, math lessons, library study sessions, history lessons, and our outstanding student loan payments could’ve provided us preparation for the twenties coaster.

The worst thing… our friends, families, mentors haven’t prepared us either for the twenties coaster. It’s as if change is the taboo side effect of your twenties, much like a women’s time of the month or the smelly side effect of coffee we all experience mid-afternoon (you know what I mean). The point: THE TWENTIES ROLLER COASTER IS UNMENTIONABLE. Instead, society is telling us our twenties are the time of our lives, full of endless and untouched happiness. So, twenty-somethings are stuck in their lonely minds, perhaps without any guidance or poor guidance to help them through. Maybe they even begin to think that others aren’t experiencing the same thing.

But Bob Dylan is right, “times they are a-changing.”

Individuals in their twenties ARE facing more stressors from life than ever before. In fact, the Stress in America report by the APA has found twenty-somethings to be amongst the highest stressed populations. Reports are contributing increased stressed, anxiety, and depression to financial stressors, appearance, career worries, fears of the unknown, social media, rising housing costs, a changing economy and government, poor emotional support, a lacking healthcare system, and limited opportunities for healthy lifestyles.

The solution to our carnival ride? Well, standing up and challenging society to start talking is the first step! Without conversations, we won’t be able to grow and learn. Standing up and talking to others about your struggles is the most powerful move in challenging societal actions, and chances are when you stand up, others will too.

So, in true internet article fashion I’m going to help start the conversation with a list! Whether you are facing a move, waiting on employment opportunities, going through a break up, or starting a family, there are a few ways to help you work through the twenties roller coaster in a healthier and more productive way…

1. Acknowledge the Roller Coaster

Much like an addict must acknowledge they have a problem, you must acknowledge this time in your life as change period. Say it out loud, recognize the impact it will have, and follow the next steps.

2. Accept the Feelings and Change as a Normal Process of Life

The worst thing anyone can do to their well-being is neglect their emotions. You don’t have to sit in a dark room with Ray LaMontagne playing in the background to connect with how you’re feeling. Instead, in situations where emotions become present, let them be present and share them out loud with yourself and others. This allows you to acknowledge them, understand why they are happening, and take action to control them.

3. Ask Around and Talk About It!

No one will ever know there is a problem, if you don’t tell them. Do you think the Standing Rock Sioux Tribe could’ve produced attention and action for their cause if they didn’t share their pain? NO. Stand up and talk to others your age and older, I guarantee you they have life lessons and advice to share.

4. Determine What You Can Control During This Time

The best way to defeat feeling overwhelmed or out of control is to break the problems down into smaller issues. Smaller issues, much like smaller goals, are easier to control, work through, and resolve. Make a list of the small things you can control and determine in your life. You will fell 90 percent better afterwards, because those will consist of the important things in life like your feelings, family, friends, health, and well-being.

5. Use the Downtime to Focus on Bettering Your Well-Being

Your well-being is with you on the twenties coaster… which means it is also facing the ups, downs, turns, and spins just as much as you are. Our well-being can consist of several different aspects and is different for each person. Therefore, it is vital to determine what well-being means for you. Use your top five aspects of well-being as your goals throughout your twenties and watch your roller coaster start to slow down.

6. In the End, Know That You Are the Expert on You

Only you can truly understand your struggles, your feelings, actions, choices, and desires. And that is an advantage in life! It means your main priority can be working on yourself, knowing your truth, and determining what fits best in your life. Despite responsibilities and the obligations of life, you will always be the expert on your experiences and that is your power to help stop the roller coaster.

7. Know You Are Adaptable and Life Will Continue

In the end, the twenties roller coaster will choose another path and life will continue. There is no way to know what the other path may bring, but the existence of a tomorrow is comfortable and hopeful.

References

1. https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/mental-health-young-adults-stress-depression-anxiety-ocd-study-a8233046.html

2. https://www.popsugar.com/fitness/Millinnial-Mental-Health-Study-2018-45204433

3. https://thoughtcatalog.com/lauren-ellman/2013/10/generation-anxiety-floating-on-angst/

4. https://www.bustle.com/articles/184650-why-is-anxiety-so-common-among-twentysomethings

5. https://www.medicaldaily.com/young-adults-most-stressed-out-group-america-survey-finds-244439