Setbacks & Heart Break

Over the course of a career, there will be ups and downs. Trials and tribulations that will push the body, test the mind and attempt to bend the spirit. Some of these are within our control, others not so much. Over my career, I've had bad games, broken bones, political decisions, and of course terrible statistics at one point or another. Why am I bringing all of this up? The road to the top is long, difficult, and, sometimes, you need a little luck on your side too.

Trying to Go to University

Like most kids, I dreamed of playing on a big university hockey club south of the border in the USA. Hearing the cheering fans, playing the game I love and getting my education. Most of that came true in a weird way but getting there wasn't the usual path. I was undrafted to the WHL, I played half a season of Junior A and essentially was a wandering suitcase. No matter how well I played I wasn't getting my break to show what I could really do. Then finally, after all the phone calls, emails and messages sent to clubs across North America, I received one yes. That was all it took, having that half season put me on level to be looked at seriously at the NCAA D2-3 level, and I did earn my spot with Assumption College. All of a sudden it looked like everything was starting to come together. I was set and ready to go, or so I thought. After registering, getting all the fun paperwork done I received my first school bill.... Even with the scholarships, there was no way that was going to come to fruition. Who had that money and where would I ever be able to get any of it. Loan offices, banks, family members, grants, and bursaries—I went through the entire gambit to find something. At the end of the day, it wasn't doable. Now to say that was a low point would be a lie. I was crushed and beyond devastated. I had spent all these years building up to continue my career but on an even more important note, to get a degree. I grew up very humbly and there wasn't exactly enough laying around or put away without hockey for me to just go to school. Even if I worked and took out loans I would still be squeezing it. Hockey was my way out; it was my path to something better. But it felt like it had all been ripped away.

I spent the next two months preparing myself for life after hockey. I didn't train as much as in the past. The gym was now something to do to keep fit, but it wasn't so motivating when there was nothing to really work for, or so it seemed. Late July, I received a phone call from a tiny unknown school near Philadelphia that wanted me to head out there and join them. It wasn't the level that I wanted to be at but at this point it was the only way to continue my career. I quickly attempted to get myself back into game shape and hesitantly headed south.

At the end of the day, there can be some major bumps and detours on the road to what you want. It takes a lot of patience, fortitude, and resilience to not lose faith completely. I was lucky to go to a great school that became a home and continue my career in Sweden and now Denmark. One school being out of reach allowed me to realize how blessed I am to even play and to have an education. Don't give up faith.