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Self Worth

Finding yourself

I think there comes a point in life when everyone questions their worth here on earth. Why am I here? What's the point? What is my ultimate purpose in this world we live in? There is even times when I don't even know who I am anymore. Lately life has just been complete shit and is just all going down hill and it is barely half the year! No matter what I do I can't do anything right. All my life I have struggled with self worth. Growing up wasn't very easy for me. Now I'm not going to go into detail for this is not the right time for it. We will save it for another day. However, I will tell you that it is not easy trying to convince yourself that you are worth it. In my own personal experiences, it is fucking hard. Especially when you deal with depression and anxiety. It is like you added ten more pounds of weight on your shoulders to deal with on top of all the other crap that you go through daily. It wasn't until a year ago that I shouldn't care what people think. Now it is easier said than done because it took me years to realize this! Honestly though, it's the realest truth you will ever hear. Once I figured that out, I started feeling better about myself. Another thing I struggled with (and still do actually) is freedom. Now to most that sounds silly but in most Mexican families, we live under our parents house, we follow their rules. Growing up I have always been obedient and did everything I was told. I have a big heart and a hard time saying no or being rebellious but there was just some things I couldn't do anymore. So I learned to grow some balls and stand up for myself. That just led to confrontation and arguments (with a little physical fighting too.) It was to the point where my living environment was too toxic to be around, so I left for a few weeks. My relationship with the person is still very rocky, but at least it died down a bit. I didn't like how they tried to control my every move and that's not why I came back. I am already an adult, doing my own things, already learned everything about growing up, I am pretty sure I can make my own decisions too. I am not a little kid no more! You came teach me what I already know. You can only support me and my choices. I am growing up so of course I am going to do what I want. If I make mistakes on the way, that's okay because we live and we learn. By doing my own thing it helped me learn who I am and who I want to be instead of always being stuck at home doing nothing for myself. I can finally figure out what I want to do with my life without anyone Co-interfering with my options. Its my life, my choice, my freedom, why should it matter to anyone else what I want to do with my life. Mind your business! (I like to tell people this now.)There is always a purpose why you are here on earth. Don't take crap from anyone and listen to yourself. You are just as important as everyone else. It took me a while to realize that, so please listen to me. Find your worth. Find your purpose. Find yourself.

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Self Worth
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