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How to Own Your Body

How to Achieve Confidence in Yourself

By Arlo LPublished 6 years ago 5 min read
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There are parts of me that want to hide from the attention of people, but there are parts of me who want to scream "This is me, I am here, I am not for sale."

We are constantly gunned with representations of what we as human beings should look like, how we should walk, talk, eat, breathe, speak, even sh*t.

Today, it ends.

So sit down baby, your cousin Arlo-El's gonna teach you how to own your body.

1. You own your body!

Every day I wake up, and I look at my body and I tell myself:

"This shit was expensive."

It took someone nine months to make your body, it's perfect! It's expensive, it costs a lot to keep up a body. I know this might sound a bit degrading but sometimes you need to think of your body like a car; I bought this thing with my own damn money.

You don't keep a car in the garage, you don't spend time trying to explain to people why you bought your X instead of their Y, to hell with that! You bought your car, you can paint it, you can customize it, you can dirty it up. Why? Because it is yours.

Don't let anyone tell you what to do with your vehicle. It was meant to be driven.

2. Skin marks are natural tattoos.

I have stretch marks on the sides of my waist because I have pear-shaped body proportions, I used to hate them, now I love to look at them. I have some blackheads on my nose, I don't wear makeup, and I think they're cute.

But sometimes I don't think they're cute, that's okay too.

It's important to remember that your scars and bumps and marks are a signature detail on your body. Some of them might look better than other's but don't feel bad letting them shine.

3. It's okay to wanna be sexy.

I love the shape of my body, it's a mash-up of masculine and feminine proportions. I love it.

But it is in no way a standard of beauty.

People don't stare at me on the streets, they don't ask me what my secret is, they don't pester me with compliments. I just love my body shape, sue me.

And coming with that self-love is the fact that I always try to show it off as much as possible, I wear black to slim my stomach down, I wear baggier pants to make my thighs seem bigger (they are big). I love looking like that, I love feeling sexy.

I'm not gonna apologize for that.

When I'm older I plan on wearing even more form-fitting things because it makes me feel good.

Wear things that make you feel good, then you'll feel sexy.

4. It's okay to hate parts of your body

I have a large forehead, it's been a problem for me since early childhood. The thing is, I can't do anything about it right now.

I used to wear hats every day just so that people wouldn't point it out or make jokes about it, until one day I said, "You will not be ashamed for your body."

I didn't wear a hat for six months. It was great, I got jokes but hey, I felt stronger.

I do wear headbands more often now, but again, I always wanna feel good when I walk out of the house. Learning to deal with a part of my body that I didn't like lead me to feeling more self confident overall, even when I started wearing headbands again. Confidence comes from knowing that inside you are beautiful and gorgeous, no matter what the outside says.

5. There are always gonna be people that love you.

I don't care what you look like, a McDonald's sign, Gigi Hadid, Arlo-El Leroy—it doesn't matter, people are going to love you. There's always going to be someone who says "That's hot, I like that," and that's the beauty of taste.

The same can be said in vice-versa. Beauty is the perception of perfection and uniqueness in the eye of the mind.

I can tell you right now that there are gorgeous people who I would never date because I'm simply not attracted to them. I can tell you there are people who probably wouldn't be rated a seven that I would let run a train on me—the point is, beauty is relative.

If you're a dorky girl who likes wearing sweaters and playing videogames and has braces, there's going to be a guy or girl who likes you for that.

If you're a fashion model who likes to drink moscato and reads PAPER, there are going to be people who love you for that too.

I for one, love any guy with an accent and big lips, that's just me.

6. Remember RuPaul

There is one quote that I'd like to end this article on:

"If you don't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?"

It took me years to love myself the way I do now, we're all on different trains, different cabins, different scenery, the point is it's a ride, so enjoy it.

You will find the beauty in yourself, you will find beauty in others, loving yourself and owning your body comes from knowing that you're not always going to feel like Oprah Winfrey; you're gonna feel like Britney Spears (2007) too. And that's okay.

Just whatever you do, have fun with it. It's sexy to have fun.

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About the Creator

Arlo L

Poet

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