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Having a Mind of My Own

Journey to Loving myself

By Cathy (Christine Acheini) Ben-Ameh Published 5 years ago 3 min read
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There are so many flippant quotes and statements being flung about on social media and the rest of the internet that, in my mind, have contributed to the shut down of general sense and basic intelligence within the human race.

Simply put, the internet, and all that unfiltered information flying about and within it could be a self-imploding bomb with external catastrophic effects as well.

One quote that made the rounds in my circles when I still bothered with social media that I would like to touch on goes,

"Never get upset when you see your ex with someone else, because my parents taught me to share my used toys with the less fortunate."

No wonder, this person didn't put a name tag beneath their statement. Comparing a human being to a toy may be partly responsible for your ex being your ex, mate. Not your benevolence but your lack of respect and dodgy attempt at keeping your bruised ego intact. Next!

"An unhealed person can find offense in pretty much anything someone does. A healed person understands that the actions of others have nothing to do with them. Each day you get to decide which one you will be."

This simply comes across as don't get hurt, don't get offended, or something is wrong with you. And if you are the owner of this statement, fix up! It is one of the most institutionally abusive quotes I have ever encountered. This so-called "healed" person stands at their high pedestal telling everyone that complains of how they have been spoken to or treated that they feel hurt because they are not healed. Duh! If you step on my foot and stand there and don't take it off, I am hurt already dude! What part of me was hurt before I realised you were hurting me? Another classic quote for the "gaslighters' club." Maybe take a lesson from Abraham Lincoln who says

"We should be too big to take offense and too noble to give it."

Don't treat anyone how you would rather not be treated, and then give them guidelines on how best to react.

It's like the 'best before' dates on milk. In my experience, the milk starts to taste off even days before the manufacturer claims it should.

We must learn to not only trust our instincts, but respect our individual tastes. Because the milk that tastes 'off' for me may be perfect for your palette.

I guess it's fair to say that singular statements presented as a general truth tend to prove more harmful than just accepting people and situations as they are—uniquely different. So what works for you may not necessarily work for the next person.

Anyone has the wit to take a situation, forgetting that their response and outlook to it is completely different from billions of other people, but very few have succeeded in convincing the rest of us that our instincts for personal preferences may be faulty in some way.

Perhaps if we started to ask ourselves what we think about the situations around us, independent of what the media or family, friends, and social circles think of these things, we will come to realize the peace and contentment that comes with living our own truths.

I can very well assure you that a lot of folks are likely to cease to subscribe to you, but in the long run, quality does indeed beat quantity.

Furthermore, the pro of having less regrets in life outweighs the cons of forever asking yourself, 'what if?'

Knowing myself, I find, has made me present, and being present inclines me to always ask 'why?'

Do you know yourself?

Happy Journey to loving yourself

advice
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About the Creator

Cathy (Christine Acheini) Ben-Ameh

Bio:

Cathy Ben-Ameh has published two books; "The Impact of Music Streaming on The Music Industry: Case study-Spotify" and "'13- A Chapbook of 13 Short Poems". https://linktr.ee/cathybenameh

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