Exceptional Expectation

Expectation is vitally important. It is the enemy of accomplishment, while also being the driving force of achievement. For something so crucial, we certainly diminish its vitality.

Let's back this whole thing up. No kid strives to reach mediocrity. No young person closes their eyes at night envisioning grasping the life of the average. Furthermore, as parents, who decides their child is "just good enough," or "middle of the pack"? Optimism is a part of human nature that gets slowly deteriorated by negative life experience and group pessimism.

Now, I could revisit some of the causes of such societal change, such as participation ribbons. However, I have already made my strong feelings known on this particular topic. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize that passing around handouts for the simple act of showing up does not breed future champions. If we receive a similar prize for attendance as we do for winning, then where is the drive to succeed? Let's put this in terms that are easily recognizable. If a student did zero work in class, zero homework, and bombed every test, but showed up 100 percent of the time, what score do they receive? Allow me to answer for you... They failed... miserably. Appearance does not account for lack of substance. Please let us remember that simple fact.

My apologies, I seem to have strayed off course. What is it about our level of self-expectation that has so deteriorated? I propose that a multitude of factors are responsible, the greatest of these being our willingness to accept obstacles as a finality. The vast majority of the current generation is being allowed to believe that insurmountable objects exist, and that potential is for those living in a different life scenario. Where does this self-depreciating thought process begin? (Without mentioning participation ribbons, I swear I'm done with that portion). As a coach and personal trainer, I have seen many different methods of encouragement from parents. In some, they are boasted about regardless of results. Others congratulate effort while maintaining a view of the end goal (success), and then there are those who are heavily critical. Let me tell you, the first and third are polar opposites, but similar in the fact that they are extremely unhelpful and unhealthy. An eager teacher can never impart skill and wisdom on an unwilling recipient, and an eager student can never break through barriers via complacent instruction.

I am a dreamer, a visionary. I may not have been brought up the easiest road, but I have always been raised to believe that good enough is not good enough. We may be bogged down in a current situation, but never give up on the goals that we have set in our mind's eye. You may feel that I'm exaggeratory, but it pains me to see youthful talent be wasted amongst an ocean of abandoned dreams. Being given ice cream after a tough practice, a day off after a loss, and a medal for second place are all equal insults. It diminishes the importance of winning, and therefore decreases the value of hard work (which Baby Boomers love to complain about in Millennials and younger, yet refuse to take any responsibility for).

Rather than focus on an unknown atrocity in the development of our current generation, let's look at a solution. Stop. Just stop. Stop thinking that your child is entitled based on enrollment. Cancel your subscription to CryMeARiver.Org and pickup the newest issue of WinnersRUs. Looking at the paths to the greatest success stories is not simply an inspiration, and stop treating it like one! It's a guidebook to your achievement, to your child's. Be rid of the post-game, championship-less celebrations. Instead, let them know that you're proud of their effort, but we'll be in the gym tomorrow to get better. I promise you, anyone truly chasing a dream won't wait until sleep hits to realize it...they'll take every opportunity to make it their reality.

"High achievement always takes place in the framework of high expectation." - Charles Kettering