Cultivation doesn't start when the weeds start growing; it starts when you prepare the seedbed or planting area for your vegetables or flowers. You'll need various hoes, cultivators, spades, and digging forks to create a good seedbed. (https://garden.org/learn/articles/view/2447/)
You have questioned your worth. And have had relied on others to tell you your value. Value DOES NOT come close to worth. Others may or may not take advantage of you. They may selflessly help you or selfishly use you. Agendas and intentions are only clear with proper communication. There is a reason why we, human beings, have a tripartite identity: Heart, Mind, & Spirit. These are the identities that define you as you are. Forget about status, gender, sex, race, religion, creed those are categories that do not define you, they limit you in the scope of your worth. This is how people create value. They place you within these confines, imprison you in an ideology of service rather than humanity. When we correlate humanity with categories, we are creating a system of service. Those who can serve us most effectively are at the top. And those who can't are at the bottom, and we have thus created a dichotomy. A relational system in which the top is effective and the bottom is ineffective. To complicate matters more, we assign the terms good to effective and bad to ineffective. We have thus created another relationship, one based on comparison and rating. We rate each other on non-human factors and non-identifiers yet we are ultimately using the data to assign value to humanity.
This is ludicrous. Humanity is about heart. About mind. About spirit.
Religion has become tainted with the negativity of the Ego. We have veered away from the community and communal living into fascism and totalitarianism. We have taken control of everything we could have: the environment and other people, for our own gain. But true humanity, the only humanity, is in the metaphysical.
We are part of the cosmological. We are the Universe. And to believe otherwise is, frankly, the only true Sin.
To cultivate heart, mind, and soul, listen to the echoes within the body. The vessel of your true self. For flesh is merely a container, you will continue to exist, not live, but exist for eternity. Death is not an end. You will leave a legacy, regardless of your actions. And as long as that remains, you are existing. Prophets never die. People can easily become prophetic. It required discipline: Jesus fasted, the Buddha fasted. They endured self imposed trials and societal issues to not become anything, but to simply exist.
We have lost our humanity in the greed of materialism. Capitalism is, and has been for a long time, destroying the essence of numerous people around the world. Poverty is a construct, for our existence does not depend on income nor possession of goods.
How do you think the animals, the wild, survives? Because they exist. There is no present or future for them. They operate on instinct and habits, passed down by the firsts of their kind.
And we, who are no different than the lion or the bird, have become to enamored by Ego and "consciousness" that we have lost our connection to the Universe.
Fast. Write. Read. Listen and Hear. Breath. Meditate. Clean.
Practice Honesty. Empathy. Compassion. Truth. Practice true Humanity. Pray.
There is NO TRUE RELIGION. The only absolute is that there is no absolute. This experience is a paradox. Life is more than just breathing and paying bills. It’s more than fighting. More than everything we could ever imagine. And yet we create the world we exist in through our collective consciousness and unconsciousness.
This is push and pull. Yin and yang. Ebb and flow. This, experience of existence is melodic. It is vibrational and magnetic. Resonate. Vibrate higher.
Believe yourself. In yourself. For you are more than value. You more than categories. You are human. You are INFINITY.
It’ll take time. Be patient. It’ll be painful. Be strong. It’ll be lonely. Be kind to yourself. This is cultivation.