Not everyone is blessed with the gift of being confident and the ability to talk to anyone and put themselves out there, and unfortunately there are a lot of people out there that struggle with their self confidence and feeling comfortable within their own skin. Believe me, I am one of those people. But there are things that you can do every day to "fake" confidence and slowly build it for real.
Conveying confidence is important in many and most situations, and posture is a crucial part of that. Whether you are standing up or sitting down, you need to make sure of one important thing, you stand/sit tall.
Sitting With Confidence:
- Shoulders back
- Spine straight
- Sit all the way back
- Head up straight
- Arms to the side
- No fidgeting - Make sure that you keep still enough so that you do not look nervous, as moving a lot is a sign of being uncomfortable in a situation. Or if you are like me, it is just a natural thing to move a lot. But in the right situations, you will have to fight this natural instinct.
Standing with confidence:
- Stand straight
- No moving around - such as changing postures every couple minutes
- Be aware of your arms - Keep them to the side or on your hips.
- Chin up - Make sure that your chin is level, so your head is straight up. Do not put your head up that high that it looks as though you are looking down your nose at them. Nothing good will come out of that! Trust me!
Always look at the person that you are talking to and do not be afraid to catch their eye. Creating eye contact with the person you are talking to, especially if you are in an interview, will make people believe what you are saying and will gain trust in you.
Tricks for When You Think You Shouldn't Make Eye Contact or Are Looking at Them for a Long Time:
- Follow their hands, or follow your own hands as you talk.
- If they look at a piece of paper, look at it with them.
- If they look at their phone, take the chance to look around.
Creating the perfect voice is not necessarily hard, as long as you have some practice. It is important to create a strong voice and speech pattern as people tend to believe someone who speaks in a confident tone and do not stutter on words.
- Warm your vocals.
- Practice what you are going to say beforehand.
- Project your voice.
- Believe what you are saying.
- Speak in a loud tone.
Make sure that you look the best that you can be. I know this can come across as shallow, but if you make sure that you wear the best clothes you can, and do your hair, employers or even every day people will take you more seriously.
Things to Make a Better Appearance:
- Clean hair
- Smart clothes
- No chipped nail varnish
- Nicely shaven
- Tattoos - This last one may seem controversial, but some people are not keen on tattoos, so if possible, if you have any "offensive" tattoos be careful about covering them. You may not agree with this one and neither do I, but if you want to impress someone important, say an interviewer, it is important that they cannot portray any negativity with you.
Putting all these things to practice will make people believe you are a confident person, and in the long run you will end up doing most of these things automatically and it will hopefully help you build the confidence you need and want!
Good luck out there, all my fellow introverts!