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Changing My Destiny

Inspiring people is a contagious addiction.

Current stage me at 170 lbs. and counting.

Hey, my name's Spencer. I'm A 20-year-old kid from the Bay Area, CA. It took me quite some time to come up with an actual topic of my first story as I'm the type to definitely struggle between choices. Not only is inspiration and motivation a key topic for teens and young adults of this generation, but its probably something that should be taken more seriously in life, now more than ever. I was born and lived in Brawley, CA with my mom and dad until I was probably three, and yes! No one hardly knows where that is! I've moved around here and there until about fifth grade when I landed in San Jose, CA which is where I've been ever since. Growing up in this day and age of social media, insecurities and peer pressure have never been higher. You're told what to wear, what's cool to eat, what to say and what type of group you belong in just by your appearance or speech. People believe they have to run with the crowd to be liked or wanted. All of my life I've been the kid who got along with every type of person, just because that's who I am. I'm quiet which some can call introverted, but I see it as listening. I like to listen a lot more than I do talk, it allows me to understand that person or people better. I've rarely ever had issues with people or bullying, but growing up in a crowded city, especially with social media breaking out in every possible way that it could, had its side effects and negatives. I didn't grow up being taught confidence or courage or happiness. I grew up being told I have to look a certain way, or talk to certain people to be liked. I always had the mindset of  "you're average" or "you just aren't cut out to make it big in life." I've lived with this constant mindset since I knew how to think like it. 

Once I came home from a family funeral, that's when everything in my life changed. Every thought that went through my head, every movement I made, I made it count. I used to procrastinate like it was an addiction. I would rarely EVER be motivated to do anything throughout my life besides sit in bed, go to work... rarely, and get deeper and deeper into a self-hating pit that just seemed to dive worse every single day. I didn't feel confident, I didn't feel worth, and I didn't feel like I was good enough to be happy. I always considered my life to be mediocre, and that's just how it was meant to be for me. I was going to work a 9-5 job, and maybe find someone who I marry and live my life with. After that family event, every aspect of my thinking changed. I don't exactly know how; maybe it was through fear of death without warning, or fear of just being mediocre and never accomplishing goals and dreams because of what I thought others would think of me. I no longer lay unmotivated, nor scared and fearful of what others may think of me. If you're somebody who feels like I used to.. afraid, unmotivated, depressed, ugly, anxious... then this story is exactly for you. The unheard teens and young adults out there struggling with life silently... not knowing what you want in life, not feeling good enough for anything or anyone, or even feeling the sickening peer pressure of social media and its agendas. 

I'm sure you're wondering how to gain that confidence and motivation to do what you want in life, whether that's starting the career you want, making a high risk investment into a life changing opportunity, or even to just ask out that girl or guy you've been interested in. It doesn't happen overnight, that's for sure. But it also doesn't take a year to change your mindset to make anything possible for yourself. YOU can make a difference, and that doesn't have to be the world that you make a difference in. It can simply be people you come in touch with every single day. You can change their world. That's something I've always loved to do. I love making people laugh, and smile, and I'm always happy to help motivate someone, because it builds the fire of energy I already have at that moment. You don't need to worry about what others think. You're young, you don't have anything to lose. Take all the risks in the world that you want to. "Life is short" is definitely not an inspiring phrase. It's an immature one to use for doing irresponsible things. We're young as hell, we have 80 percent of our life left. Use that time to build the life you want. Not the life you think you can realistically have. Take the risks on a job opportunity, on investments, on doing what makes YOU happy. After all, we aren't on this earth to live for others. 

What I found to help my daily motivation up-keep is the use of verbally telling myself, convincing my mind that I am what I set myself up to be. Every. Single. Day. What you feed your brain is exactly what your brain will feed your beliefs. If you wake up in the morning and tell yourself that you feel ugly or lame or useless... how do you think your day will pan out? Even if you feel dumb, just take some time out of your day, even if it's five or ten minutes to invest in your mental health by contributing positive words to your brain. Telling yourself that you can make the life you want and build the outcomes yourself, will only bring positives into your atmosphere and surrounding. There is no possible way that positive reinforcement negatively impacts your health or life. If you really want to be happy, take the time out of your day, and tell yourself that you're worth it, and that you have all the time in the world, and that you can do anything you set your mind to. You're beautiful, you're smart, you're different (In a good way!). You can change your life's outcome by changing your mindset. You have to take the time, and sit in front of a mirror, or even by yourself in your room or the bathroom. If you want to change your future, and change your happiness, you have to change the mindset. Your body won't do a thing until your mind tells it to. 

I'm not a fan of working for others. I love giving, but working a 9-5 or in my case a 12-9, for someone else, has never been my niche. I'm not a fan of trading my time for money because that's not how I'll achieve my goals. I have insecurities, and to this day I still see them. But the difference between allowing yourself to thrive and succeed and be happy, and procrastinating and abusing your time, is mindset. It's a powerful tool that's allowed me to project myself out of a depressed endless pit of insecurity and worry, into a world of inspiration, fiery motivation, and career changing choices. It's an every day option by yourself and no one else, to change how your life goes. Tell yourself you're the "next big thing" or that you "have what it takes to be whatever I want to be." Feed your mind, and your mind will repay you like you've never realized before. Every choice you make through out your day, and every thought that comes across your mind, even the words that speak from your mouth, are your choice. Whatever emotions you feel, is a choice. Anger, sadness, happiness, frustration, anxiousness, depression; it's all a choice. 

If you've read this far, I would like to clarify that none of this is easy by any means. Start slow, every day try to be better than the last. You are the only person who can change your life for the better. Do not give in to temptation, or depression or sadness. You're better than that and I appreciate you. Thank you for reading my first story. Yes it was sloppy and my writing will improve over time. If you have any suggestions, critiques, or criticism, or compliments, please do not hesitate to send them my way!

I will be putting out more stories, related and unrelated to this story, and they will increase in detail, maturity, and length. If you have any responses, or would like to tell me your story, please do! I mainly use instagram as my source of social media. Don't hesitate to send me a message @crazyboiispencer_ !

Spencer Schmidt
Spencer Schmidt

Name's Spencer. I live in San Jose, CA. I'm 21 years old. The goal is to inspire, motivate, and network with those who have the same passion and desire as me!

Instagram: @crazyboiispencer_ ( Leave suggestions, comments, and feedback!)

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