A Letter to My Future Self

I know you feel like you need to be doing a million different things and want to accomplish so many things, but quit putting a time limit on your work. You’re a perfectionist, and so focused on the details that you’re going to burn yourself out if you keep trying to reach the deadlines that YOU put there. Let it happen when the universe says so. You’re putting yourself through the same thing twice, because you stress yourself out over something that has yet to happen. So relax and keep grinding.

I hope you are as happy as you are in this very moment. Protect that happiness, it’s genuine and should be preserved in a glass bottle. You deserve all the happiness in the world, and to keep the things/people that bring you happiness in your life for as long as you can. Especially that boy, you know the one.

Keep listening to your intuition, she’s never wrong. But, remember, following your intuition is a three step process: hearing it, trusting it, and acting upon it. It’s easy to listen, but what’s harder is trusting it and acting upon it. It might seem impractical, impossible, challenging, or just straight up bat shit crazy. She’s not always “right,” but she will teach you what you need to know, and will guide you through everything. So, not only listen, but trust and act upon it.

I hope you never use some lame ass, complete horse shit excuse as the reason you’re still in a bad relationship. You deserve to be in relationships that make you happy, that feed your soul, and help you grow. You are worthy of nothing but connections that are loving, kind, enriching, and authentic. Before you settle for anything less than, remind yourself of the places you’ve visited, and the people in your journey should make you feel safe, loved, and enough.

A very wise man that you’ve already met is proud of the woman you have become. I know the words “you’re not working to your full potential” play in your head every time something regarding your craft gets brought up, but he is proud of you. What will be past—you know, she heard it herself. You’ve become a woman who is genuinely happy, from the inside out, and a woman who knows what she wants with/from her life. There are so many people who are proud of you for that, but I know hearing it from this very wise man gets you a little emotional.

I hope you stay yourself. You have worked your ass off to be who you are; don’t throw it away over a boy, a shitty situation, or who someone thinks you should be. Nothing is worth losing yourself over. You were never one to change to the woman people asked you to be at certain times, don’t change that. People like you for you, and they will like you for you, but if they don’t… you don’t need them anyway. Continue to undeniably be yourself.

You’ve been through a lot. Some situations you couldn’t control, and some you put yourself in. I know life is hard, but I’m proud of who you are. You are brave, bright, unnecessarily sassy, and were given this carefully protected, kind heart. So, be nice to yourself. I know giving advice is easy (you do it all the time, give it a break sister), but when you’re in a difficult situation the answers aren’t ever as clear. That’s because when someone else comes to you with a problem, they are in a maze and lost, while you have a bird eye’s view, and can easily see where they need to go to get out of the maze. However, when you’re in the maze, AKA your problem, all you see are barriers, and you need an outside perspective to help you turn the right way. Keep in mind, they can only tell you which way to go, but they can’t force your legs to walk in a certain direction. Whether to walk that way or not is entirely your decision. Remember what I said earlier about your intuition.